Sunday, September 27, 2009


I find myself turning to this source out of pure desperation, when there is absolutely no outlet for my grief and sadness. I'd like to consider it a form of therapy - facing my thoughts, feelings head-on. If you run away from something, it never goes away, it will stay inside you forever. If you fight something, it only makes that something stronger. Then again, until you find something you are willing to fight for, you'll always be looking for something to fight against.

My life is completely and utterly upside-down - 180 degrees from where I was just 3 months ago. Things will never be the same. I would never expect them to be. I don't want them to be. But I do want them to be different than they are at this very moment. Much different.

Our entire world is fleeting. Each moment passes and we are closer to the end - the old cliche of being suspended in a constant and consistent state of moving toward the finale. A pessimistic point-of-view: we are perpetually dying.

Maybe a happy ending is just knowing when to drop the curtain. You have to drop it at that exact moment of bliss for it to hold any meaning. One moment too late and we are right back where we started.

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